Many of us have been there. A dark, dark place. A long tunnel. So long that you cannot see the light at the end of it. You have no clue how you ended up here, neither how long you are staying. Life overwhelms you and you feel powerless in the face of any challenge. The first one being getting out of the bed every morning...
But it wasn't always this way.
I like you to know that your depression isn't an untreatable illness you are bound to suffer from with no end...
...Unless you want to of course. 'Are you crazy? Why would I want to be feeling so bad!?'
Because your victim might make you think that your suffering is somehow good for you. Perhaps you suffered depression for so long that you simply cannot imagine your life without it. But where there is a will there is a way. Take it from someone who has been there!
The problem with depression is that the WILL to face anything is litterally non-existent. There is a way around this one however, and that is understanding your DIS-EASE in depth. Because as complicated as it sounds, depression is actually really straighforward. No, I am not suggesting that getting out of it is easy, but may this reading be your little torch, a tool which cuts through the shadows of your unhappiness - a glimpse of the light you couldn't imagine existed.
Depression is an emotional dis-ease which has mounted over time to a critical level, leading to paralysis in a physical body.
This dis-ease has originated in your soul, where living in truth and being in your life purpose feels as DEEP JOY in your heart. Every time you somehow went against yourself (against that you truly are) you felt emotionally un-easy. And because you were taught nothing about your emotions, you never understood what is your inner discontentment trying to tell you. Your inner emotional agitation started some time in your childhood. Depending on how emotionally intelligent were those who brought you up, they either knew how to communicate their emotions (and could teach you about them), or they did not.
Us empaths grew up, more often than not, in emotionally unhealthy environments. Although we are able to read the emotional states of others we aren't typically skilled in dealing with our own. Because we are more in touch with our emotional bodies, more emotinally sensitive hence FEEL with more intensity, we are prone to becoming depressed. As supposed to those who are able to disconnect themselves from their emotional bodies (narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths).
Emotional feedback is necessary for you to uncover what is it about your existence that feels 'OFF'.
Our troubles started because we came to (falsely) believe that our unhappiness is directly related to our feelings of emotional pain. Whenever we felt emotional discomfort IN THE MOMENT we associated it with things being bad and us being unhappy. Yet feeling our emotional pain, accepting it as a necessary part of any healing process, is the first step towards transforming it. Clearing depression is really about starting to clear the heavy stuff from our psyche as supposed to shutting it out or pretending it isn't there. Because like the closet full of stuff it is bound to fling open one day.
Long term unhappiness is brought about by our delusion that our emotions are bad for us. And because of this common, society and culture largely aproved belief we get stuck in life. Our mind judges our emotions and turns against us like an endlessly critical parent against a child who, indeed, is emotional...
Do you believe that you shouldn't be feeling a certain way? It is your inner Judge talking. It tells you that you shouldn't be so SENSITIVE, that others are normal and that there is something wrong with you.
Feeling sad isn’t the same as feeling depressed. Depression is lingering sadness. Lingering because it isn’t allowed to leave. Guess what keeps your sadness in place? Your critical thoughts. Which play on your mind but you aren't aware of them. Neither you are aware of their damage as they run endless circles in the background of your consciousness.
A thought is kept in its place by your belief. Once you know that a thought is invalid, it stops bartering you and your emotions attached to these thoughts simply dissipate. They literally vanish and with them your misery. So to release yourself from the prison of your depression you must stop judging how you feel, learn to name your unpleasant emotions, and re-define their role. Sadness, for example, if allowed to exist, will also depart and flush anything old we no longer need in our lives in order to make space for the new. If our sadness has nowhere to go (by us ignoring it or pushing it into our subconscious ) in time we start to FEEL HEAVY under the weight of old, piling stuff. The weight of it all is overwhelming and we cease to function in usual ways. Because the energy of our MENTAL-EMOTIONAL BODY directly relates to the energy of our physical body, we find it hard to get out of the house, feeling excessively tired. The energy blockage shows as an illness. Physically and/or mentally we develop all sorts of diseases if this goes on long enough or if the stress reaches a critical level in relatively short space of time. In better case we find it hard to focus or catch common cold. In worst case we dissociate from our emotional bodies or develop a deadly disease due to a long term suppression of our immune system. Our immune system is the symptomatic indicator of our EMOTIONAL EASE.
Our heart is the bridge connecting us to our Soul. If there is a disconnection to the soul, we feel it as heaviness on the heart which in time shows as a disease in the body.
Remember, everything is energy. Energy doesn’t have beginning nor end. Rather, it transmutes from one form to another - it never disappears, but shows up as something else. There are no energetic boundaries between our physical and emotional bodies, nor there are energetic boundaries between our physical form and soul form. We use forms for descriptive purposes - as CONCEPTS for the mind to imagine and comprehend. But on the level that matters, the level of energy, all is ONE. It is therefore not enough to care for the well-being of your body alone, leaving your emotional body out. The gyms are full of seemingly fit individuals who's hearts and souls are dying...
Denial of your feelings, ignoring the existence of your emotional body and the inability to appropriately deal with your emotional states, will lead to EMOTIONAL DISTRESS. Such stress, even when attempted to be consciously ignored, will effect an individual unknowingly. After all, only 5% of what you perceive registers by your conscious mind, The rest simply slips under your radar.
Depression is a result of ignoring your emotional distress for so long that it literally drained all your stores undercover. But criticising yourself for allowing this won't lead you out of this vicious cycle.
To get better, to HEAL depression, start clearing the illusions from your life. Understand who you are not. Get to know your victim and rise above it! Learn about your mind and emotions, and how your belief system disturbs your inner peace. Learn about your acceptance seeking and unhealthy needs. Study your self-rejection and what it means to truly love yourself.
Thank you for reading. If my article contributed to understanding yourself, please be generous and share it with others.
Copyright © 2018 Michaela Patel